Friday 11 November 2011

Life

For a future mother, nothing is worse than losing your baby. No matter how short, or how long that baby was growing inside you, it still hits like a ton of bricks. You wonder if you can recover from such news. Lord knows, things will never be the same. A mixture of emotions flood you and the tears don’t ever seem to end. You feel robbed and angry of what could and should have been. While others around you have glowing first time pregnancies, you’re left with so many unanswered questions, but mainly WHY. Why me? Why us? You know your next pregnancy will never be the same.
So, when I found out the news we were expecting again, I did what I did the last time. I prayed. My prayers went something like this: Dear lord, I know things haven’t really been the same since I last talked to you, but I hope you can forgive me that we haven’t been as close. Now with me being pregnant again, I know you know how scared and worried we’ve been. Please, I pray, if you’re listening, please protect this baby. Please keep it healthy and safe, and let it grow.
and boy, did it grow! Weeks turned into months, and by month three, I was able to breath a certain sigh of relief. 2 arms, 2 feet, all organs, and a loud beating heart. Is there a better sound in this world?
Dear Baby, you aren't here yet but I love you more than words can say. This must be what unconditional love feels like